i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
