I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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