I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
