why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
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