Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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