I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
