Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
