she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
