This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
