that's an acceptable place to lick
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Randomize
