I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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