Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
