so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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