I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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