And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
