i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
