Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
