3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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