i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
