Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Acid is not a monday night drug
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
