Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
