I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
