those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
You have to summon your inner elephant
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
