put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
