Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
