So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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