But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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