The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
