as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
