oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
