I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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