My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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