He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
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