There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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