it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
