you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
