I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize