OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
