Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Nobody cheats on THIS.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
