i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize