I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
