Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
