I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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