I wish I only lived at night.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
