you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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