I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
