So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
