do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize
