i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
