? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
